“You are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.” – Jim Rohn
Praise hands, praise hands, praise hands. I couldn't have said it better myself, Jim.
I have the privilege of living with two of the most intelligent, naturally gorgeous, driven, and hilarious and women I know. They bring to my life inspiration, support, love, new hobbies, and fun on a consistent basis. Their daily actions show me how to be a good friend, loving daughter and hard worker.
When I leave my house during the week I head to work where I am surrounded by incredible colleagues who share my vision and passion for bettering our world. I spend most of my time working and being at home so it is critical that I am surrounded by the right people in these two environments. I am blessed to be able to say that I am. I am blessed to be able to say I am a better "me" because of who I surround myself with.
The rest of my time is spent with equally amazing people because I choose to spend it with them.
This has meant gracefully letting go of all different forms of relationships throughout the years. Before we get into how to let unhealthy relationships go, let's establish some boundaries. The following are not valid excuses to keep someone in your life:
- You have always hung out with them
- They are family
- You have known them for "x" amount of years
- They have been around for major life events
- You fear change
- They provide some status to you but your emotional health suffers
- You're comfortable with them
Excuses are no good here. "When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time" is an excellent, straightforward rule to live by, and can inspire you to take action when you know in your gut that someone is no longer benefiting your life or growth rate. It can be painful to let someone go - you feel like you're not only releasing that person, but the memories you have shared. And although they might be a person who never had your best interest in mind, that doesn't mean you two did not share meaningful moments. In my experience, allowing a slow, graceful distancing of the relationship is the most effective route. It gives you time to grieve that friendship or colleague, negates the need for a dramatic exit, and allows you to simultaneously introduce new, healthy, relationships.
Imagine a world where the only people who exist are the ones who lift you up, inspire you, support you, help you grow, help you succeed, give you love. You have the power to create that world.
If you are looking to give back more, become a professional, improve your fitness level, build your confidence or take control of your life, find women who are doing just that and surround yourself with them. I know at least one of each of these so if you need me to make an introduction, holla at ya girl.